The money wizards over at MSNBC are saying that consumers will spend 13.7 buh-zillion US dollars on Valentine’s Day gifts this year, an increase over last year’s sales.
So I have to ask, “Where are the Valentine’s Day tie-ins for foundation repair advertising?” I have not heard one radio commercial or seen one print ad from the concrete slab leveling industry jumping on the VD bandwagon to grab their share of the buying frenzy.
I don’t know if it is a lack of imagination in the advertising departments or creative juices running dry but I offer the following script to any of the foundation repair companies that would like to use it. Just fill in your local business name and phone number.
MUSIC MIXED UNDER WITH
SOUND EFFECTS OF MANLY OUTDOOR MACHINESANNOUNCER:
Hey guys. If you really want to show your lady how much you care about her and the security of her home this Valentine’s Day, why not treat her to foundation repair?
Show her how much you love her with a matching batch of piers. If there are cracks in your walls and your relationship then make that call today.
Are the doors to your heart and the garage hard to open? Are the windows to the inner you …and the back yard …sticking? Pick up the telephone and take your love for her and that slab-on-ground foundation to the next level.
Nothing says “I love you” like the reassuring underpinning of concrete or steel ramming deeper and deeper, seeking the bedrock of comfort that you both desire.
This Valentine’s Day, don’t waste money on diamonds or furs when she can have the piers and the transferable warranty she’s always wanted. She is sure to look at you in a new light and tell all her friends.
Take that first step and call (the foundation repair experts) today.
LEGAL: (Read really fast)
Not available in all states and not a guarantee of hot monkey humma humma. Ask your engineer if foundation repair is right for you. Piers are not for everyone. Must be 18 to qualify. Residency restrictions apply except for labor.
Just fax that over to the local station and you could get it on the air in no time. Radio production people really love last minute projects and your foundation repair company can still make a difference this Valentine’s Day. You’re welcome and I’m just glad I could help.